In Transformation Relationship With Jesus Comes First
Loving God and loving Jesus with all our heart and to love others is no easy journey in our restoration, well it was not for me. My journey about the love and goodness of God needed an major over hall; years of renewal and years of allowing Jesus to love me had brought me to believe He really did love me for me.
Yes I realized I was cherished and beautiful in His sight and He did accept me and would not forsake or reject or turn me away but did He Love me? Yes and not even my sin structures and brokenness stopped Him from loving me, I now know He desires to love me in our relationship regardless of my faults and flaws or call or no call.
So this is why I know that in any relationship we will find conscious and subconscious walls are up to defend and protect ourselves from being hurt; therefore areas of our heart are hardened for protection, self preservation and self defence. This causes us to not only keep The Father and Jesus out but others, yet relationship and His Love is the love we need to break down the walls.
I know it is not easy with the brokenness, but continue to seek restoration and transformation and I know that it is important to run to Jesus instead of the rotten fruit of sin and any of our false securities or at that the arms of a same sex person. I've learnt it is important to keep an open relationship being frank, honest and straight forth. I found in this He will train you in His time when we are disrespectful or full of insecurity and over reacting to our circumstances. Ï have changed so much as He built in structures over time to change me to mature me and cause my heart to want relationship with Himself and it was His doing, and it happens, so its ok, everything's all right everything's fine.
So don't give up or turn back to eat your past dead rotten fruit no matter how much you seem to think it would be delicious. It's not and we won't find life in death of regret or "if only" or "I want to" or "I just have to have someone tonight"; truth is we are His, chosen set apart cherished and greatly loved.
Your His so you may as well buckle up, accept it will be no easy walk and there is no turning back. Truth is there is no quick fix, "the years have left scars," the years have left furrows the years have built up a way of life that opposes Kingdom life but it gets easier as you allow Him to work on you and use the keys other ministries have for your healing.
Surrender for a fresh anointing of Love and invite Jesus in behind your walls of protection and allow Him to keep you standing and walking towards restoration. Come to Him as you are with all your walls just yield them to Jesus and invite Him in to break these old habit patterns.
Father where I have walls up that block my relationship with You I surrender and give the walls to you to bring down, I invite You into those I don't know and those I know ............. bring them down by Your power and Love however You will to in Your timing care and wisdom.
Father I cannot change myself I give you my hardened heart and ask for forgiveness for hardening my heart out of preservation and protection and self defence. I take You today as Love, Compassion and as a God who cares, The God who has a heart to bless me, nurture me and take care of my welfare, both spiritual and natural.
In Jesus Name Amen
Be blessed and be a blessing
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A18. Cartouche: A Homosexual Demonic Doorway
From virtually the first day I entered the ministry I have known and worked with homosexuals. I have known and shared the struggles of homosexual and bisexual friends wrestling to come to grips with their condition and, in many cases, to seek healing. This article, and I hope others to follow, is for those homosexuals and bisexuals who desire to understand the demonic connection to their condition and who desire deliverance.
This morning I had a dream about an old friend who is homosexual and who was the catalyst into my spiritual search to get to the roots of this problem. In those days most Bible-believing Christians simply viewed homosexuals as 'untouchables' and 'beyond the pale of redemption', much as they viewed (and still view) Satanists. An important prophetic word on the psychological aspects of homosexuality was a major advancement for me in the ministry. This was subsequently followed up with a ministerial discussion on the subject which was published on the internet in 1997.
Later we formed New Covenant Ministries for Homosexuals and Lesbians (NCMHL) which was largely inspired by Exodus International, a Christian group dedicated to helping homosexuals adjust to a biblical life framework. Though the demonic element was recognised, little about it was understood. We have since come to understand that the demonic aspect is as important, if not more important, to understand and tackle than the psychological conditioning that comes about, through various agencies (abusive and non-abusive), that leads to the 'female in a male body' (homosexual) or 'male in a female body' (lesbian) condition.
I realise that this is politically incorrect material and that in some countries it is a criminal offence to even criticise homosexuals and the homosexual community (one pastor in Sweden was recently jailed for preaching against homosexuality) so I wish to state from the offset that this and related articles are only for those homosexuals and others who believe this condition is unnatural and who want deliverance or to help in deliverance. Those who do not agree with our position are not 'officially' welcome here and read these materials and will not under any circumstances hold the author or his supporters accountable.
You are instructed to leave this page if you do not agree with this. If you remain, you are responsible for your own actions. This article was prompted by a prophetic dream that I had this morning which gives an important clue into the demonic element in homosexuality.
Though we as a matter of course include the expulsion of homosexual demons and the breaking of homosexual generational ties in our deliverance ministry, we have not addressed all the issues. I believe Yahweh has given me this information today for a special reason and that those who need it will be drawn to this article. I dreamed about my old friend who had once been in ministry with me before leaving it because of his homosexuality which led him into compulsive fornication. Because of our close association I knew his history intimately. At the time I received a revelation for him which showed him the first steps he needed to take in his life pending further help. As the revelation plainly stated, and as I was to subsequently learn in ministering to homosexuals, the greatest obstacle that homosexuals face is the same as that faced by heterosexuals when it comes to deliverance in any area - stubbornness and pride. For typically most people do not come to repentance until they are driven to it by overwhelming opposition in life. If we can get away with sin, we usually try to avoid repentance. It is a characteristic of the carnal nature.
In this dream my friend came to me rather as a patient comes to a doctor. He was stripped to the waist and I was examining him. Under his right armpit and at roughly the same level as his heart was something that looked just like an Egyptian cartouche or shenu. But this was not an ordinary cartouche - and it was not merely a marking on the skin. It was quite large - about 5 x 2 cm - an orangey-grey colour and made of rubbery plastic about 2 mm thick. And slightly above the centre of the cartouche was what looked like an electronic socket with several pins (male principle) in it depressed in a rectangular pit (female principle) which was obviously a place of attachment for an external object.
For those of you who have never seen a cartouche, they are long thin rectangles with the corners rounded off (see diagram to right - this one bears the name of the Egyptian demon god Horus). In fact it is a looped rope which forms a frame. In ancient Egypt this oval frame enclosed the hieroglyphics of the name of an Egyptian royal personage. Ordinary people used to wear them around their necks as protection rather as Catholics wear St. Christopher medallions to ward off evil whilst travelling. The are quite popular with people into the 'New Age' movement (see left).
Now in my dream this cartouche (see right) was embedded in his flesh above his rib-cage. Biblically the word rib (Heb. tsela) figuratively means a 'bosom companion':
"And Yahweh-Elohim caused a deep sleep
to fall on Adam, and he
slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the
flesh in its place.
Then the rib which Yahweh-Elohim had taken from man
made into a woman, and He brought her to the man" (Gen.2:21-22,
Another clue - before we unravel this dream - is the fact that anciently these cartouches were worn by people as a protection against the loss of one's NAME, or in other words, ones personality. The core issue of homosexuality is not sexual drive but identity or personality. Yes, when we break Yahweh's sexual laws, we automatically open doors to sexual demons. But there is a much deeper issue here than sex and it concerns the very basis of personality.
Homosexuals are human beings like anyone else. They think, feel and act as the heterosexual community does. And like all other
human beings they are searching for their identity - they want to know who they are. Every one does. Moreover, because Yahweh has created two genders, there is a largely unconscious part of us that is seeking for our 'other half' - we know that we cannot be complete without that other person. This awareness heightens during the teen years making teenagers very vulnerable as they grapple not only with a psychological drive to find their opposite halves, as it were, but must simultaneously contend with the hormonal drives which push them on the physical plane to fulfil the psychological. Equilibrizing these forces constitutes for most people one of the toughest things to deal with in life.
The cartouche I saw on my friend's rib-cage was tailor made. It was carefully crafted. If you have seen the film The Matrix you will recall that people had slots on them to which they could be attached to machines to control their thinking. Once they were detached from these machines they were able to see reality and got depressed.
So long as a homosexual is 'hooked up' to the controlling demon, which modifies his thinking, psychology and sex-drive, he is living in an illusion. The demon becomes the substitute for the bosom companion or rib which can only be realised by a soul-mate of the opposite gender. Homosexual lovers can never fulfil that need - instead, they become a false sexual outlet for that desire to be loved. Psychic bonds form between the male lovers and these are reinforced by the intensity and heightened awareness of the sexual act, but the bonding is not spiritual, which is the primary function of marriage. The intensity of physical passion and the psychic connectedness, however unreal, smothers the spiritual need.
The homosexual cannot see reality until he is disconnected from his demon master and the artificial programming he has received. In short, he has to be 'unplugged'. But that is not the end of deliverance. The major deliverance is concerned with the total psychic,
mental and emotional adjustment that follows. It requires constant injections of truth from the Bible and the rewiring of mental circuits that can only come about by admitting Yah'shua (Jesus) into every thought. The key demon to be rid of is the one which taps into the 'rib' area and which, through brainwashing, alters the homosexuals personality, making him believe he is a woman (or in the case of a lesbian, a man) in a man's body (woman's body in the lesbian).
The first level of attack on the question of homosexuality must therefore be defining personality. That the Bible does. For the homosexual, that means clearly affirming, in the Name of Christ that he is not a 'homosexual'. Indeed, there is no such thing as a 'homosexual', 'bisexual', 'lesbian', or even a 'heterosexual' - these are human terms. There are only two conditions: a human being in Christ and a human being outside Christ.
This is the first truth that must be appropriated. Now it must be clearly understood that once truth enters a system previously fed by lies that that system will be profoundly disturbed. The resulting chaos will likely convince the homosexual undergoing deliverance that something is 'wrong' and demonic forces will try to persuade him to return to the artificial stability he had before which was created by the demons themselves, just as the Israelites 'rationalised' they were better off in Egyptian slavery with a guaranteed source of food than living in the desert depending on Yahweh for every meal. The temptation here is between faith and 'carnal certainties'.
All deliverance results in destabilisation. There is an 'intermediary' phase which may at first seem worse than the original demonised condition itself. That is where faith is vital. Indeed, without faith, you cannot get past this transition phase. It is at this time that depression is likely to strive, doubt will replace faith, and fear, hope. It is at this time we learn how to lean on Christ - to trust Him - not knowing what will follow. And this is one reason why we have this intermediary 'desert' period - to build faith
(see A Model for Deliverance: The Exodus).
Once the demonic gateway has been closed (the cartouche), the struggle begins. And it is a fight - no question about that - a fight that may take some time as so many lies have to be unlearned, truth incorporated into the soul, and other demonic strongholds are dismantled, and in particular, the homosexual sex addiction.
I repeat, that sexuality is not the major problem for homosexuals but their personality. They need not think, moreover, that they are alone in this matter - there are all kinds of other personality problems which heterosexuals as well as anyone else can be demonically controlled by. All abnormal relationship-forming derives from this. There are many things in life which can become artificial substitutes for finding our bosom companions. Sex outside marriage is one of them.
Even sex within marriage can be artificial if it exists only for itself and doesn't connect to the spouse as a person. People seek their
'identity' in all sorts of warped ways: career, beauty, etc.. Our true identity is only realised in Yah'shua the Messiah (Jesus Christ) - only in Him do we become fully 'human'. All other relationships are distorted, usually by demons tapping into our system like 3PO in Star Wars as he accesses various computers with his rotating robotic arm. We become human in Christ and complete when we become properly connected to our spouses in Christ.
Satan knows all these things. His destruction of things human invariably begins with wrong programming. Through human "philosophy and empty deceit" (Col.2:8, NKJV) he progressively dehumanises us and leads us onto pathways of self-destruction. We must not overlook the Egyptian connection in all of this. Babylon and Egypt were the two main centres of false religion and destructive philosophy. And most 'modern' philosophies are in truth simply variations on ancient satanic themes derived from these nations. Our Western neo-paganism is but a return to old demonic lies and practices for "there is nothing new under the sun" (Eccl.1:9, NKJV) - it's all been done before. It may seem 'new' and 'different' but actually they are well-tried systems of corruption that Satan has used from the beginning. And each generation is subjected to them in similar or slightly modified ways.
The resurgence of homosexuality in the West is simply the West abandoning Christianity and returning to its pagan Greek roots.
This page was created on 10 August 2004
Last updated on 10 August 2004
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